Keeping Promises

"if you cultivate the habit of always keeping the promises you make, you build bridges of trust that span the gaps of understanding."

photo: san francisco (Apr 2004)

My last entry focused on making deposits in your emotional bank account. One way to do this is keeping our promises. According to Stephen Covey, "people tend to build their hopes around promises, particularly promises about their basic livelihood." Hence, he adopted this philosophy, "... never to make a promise I don't keep. I therefore try to make them very carefully, very sparingly, and to be aware of as many variables and contingencies as possible so that something doesn't suddenly come up to keep me from fulfilling it."

However, occasionally, despite all his effort, the unexpected does come up, creating a situation where it would be unwise or impossible for him to keep a promise he has made. Because he valued the promise, Covey either kept it anyway, or explained the situation thoroughly to the person involved and asked to be released from the promise.

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photo: san francisco
Keeping oaths and promises is important; it builds trust and makes committed human relationships possible. In the scripture, God's people are called to keep their word, even if they make promises that are tough to keep.

scripture: Again, you have heard that it was said to the people long ago, "Do not break your oath, but keep the oath you have made to the Lord." But I tell you, Do not swear at all; either by heaven, for it is God's throne or by the earth, for it is his footstool; or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the Great King... Simply let your "yes" be a "yes" and your "no", "no"

(Matthew 5:33-37).

The Bible condemns making vows and taking oaths casually, giving your word while knowing that you won't keep it, or swearing falsely in God's name.... In the above scripture, Jesus was emphasizing the importance of telling the truth. People were breaking promises and using sacred language casually and carelessly. Nowadays, truthfulness seems so rare that we feel we must end our statements with "I swear". If we feel that we have to strengthen it with an oath, something is wrong with our sincerity. If we tell the truth all the time, we will have less pressure to back up our words with an oath or a promise. Our word should be enough.

reflection: are you known as a person of your word?

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Source: Stephen Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People & LAB (1995)